Whoa These Symptoms!

I have been having such a rough time with this pregnancy, but not complaining, loving every minute of it!! I never thought pregnancy would be so hard but my OB told me it's harder on me due to all my health problems...?? Hmmm.. This pregnancy has been taking such a huge toll on my little body.. I've still been on bed rest to get the baby's heart beat up, which hopefully it is on Monday!! I have been having every 1st trimester symptom, but ing...yet *fingers crossed* hope I get lucky with that!! Just hoping I start to feel better when I hit the 2nd Trimester. I have been extremely tired, even too tired to even shower or do my make up!!! Blow drying my hair just makes me take a nap!! My boobs having been KILLING me! I don't think push-up bras are the best bras for pregnancy, aha!! May try a sports bra. Always hungry, but never know what I wanna even eat, LoL! Very hormonal! Morning sickness is sooo bad thank God for Zofran! Been my best friend! I have been feeling A LOT of stretching in my stomach, it hurts really bad, I can't imagine how bad it's gonna hurt when I'm like 7 months pregnant. ;) A lot more is going on with my body even tho it's been tough I am enjoying every second of being pregnant!! I'm finally gonna be a mommy!! EEEEK!! It's finally my turn! Can you believe it??!! I am already starting to show!! Only those around me know that I am pregnant tho. But I guess you show sooner when your slim. I will be 8 weeks come Monday! AT THE END OF THE 2ND MONTH WOOHOO!!! I have an ultrasound Tuesday and I am beyond excited!! I can't wait to see our baby again!! We already have a few names kinda picked up, but of course not gonna share them til a little while after we found out the sex!! I have been having so many pregnancy dreams. Where I am holding the baby. I had a delivery dream...oooh it really scared me!! One with taking the baby to the park. But it none of them did it show if the baby was a boy or girl...weird huh???My OB did call this week and my levels went back up all the way too 16,000s!!! YAY!!! Everything is looking beyond great now!! Still holding my breath of course!!

Oh how mommy loves you so much already!!!

2 More ER Trips.

Last Thursday I started spotting after intercourse and me being me I freaked out and went to the ER. Come to find out I'm RH negative so they gave me the RhoGAM shot. Well then come Tuesday I started bleeding more so Ryan took me to the ER, again. They did an ultrasound and were finally able to detect the heartbeat. But it was at 93, they said they want it about 120.. The doctor gave me a few shots of Demerol and put me on bed rest. I went to see my OB Tuesday for another ultrasound, beta and results from the week before beta. Come to find out my levels dropped by 1,000. And the heartbeat was the same. So she said come back Friday(yesterday) So I went back and the heartbeat went up to 100! Still low but shows that the baby is fighting and I just have a strong feeling that this baby will make it, I can't explain how I know or what I feel but I do. We also got to see the baby's heart beating!!!!! I also should get my beta results on Monday or Tuesday, but hopefully Monday. My OB wants me to come back on 2nd...2 weeks???!!! How is that safe?! I think she should be watching the baby more carefully. I also think I am going to change to my friend's OB come Monday. He is really great and a few of my friend's have delivered their babies with him. I also don't really trust my OB to deliver my baby, in March... So think I'm just gonna call and make an appt with this new one this week.

I've been trying to not stress and stay positive but it is very hard. I have never loved anyone as much as I love this baby. I have never even see an ultrasound or hear/see a heart beating this this pregnancy. This pregnancy has been hard but I know I can get through this and I will. I will do anything for this child. Whatever it takes.

7 WEEKS ON MONDAY!!

6 Weeks!! Also ER Trip.

Today I am 6 weeks pregnant!! I have made it to another week, YAY!! :) I've been having a very rough time with this pregnancy, already. I've been prescribed Percocet since 2005&OxyContin for the past 3 years. My doctor is refusing to give me my meds to ween me off, so shes making me stop cold turkey, you can't do that esp with OxyContin. I'm having the worst withdrawals, pain&pregnancy symptoms. She told me to go to rehab to detox but insurance don't cover it or I would. This could be stressing the baby out&we don't need that. So tomorrow I'm calling another doctor to get ween off the right way or even a medicine for stop the withdrawals. So just been stressing about that, a lot. I'm trying to stay calm, for the baby's sake. My main concern is the baby. Please pray that I find a doctor that helps us.

So I went to the ER Thrusday, they did a beta&an ultrasound. My beta was in the 5,000s!!! On the ultrasound they saw the sac&baby but too soon for heartbeat. They wouldn't let me see or tell me anything because they were not doctors..GRRR. I wanted to see, but I have an Ultrasound this Thursday! My very first!! I'm beyond excited&can't wait!! Counting down the days..hours..minutes. :) I will keep ya'll updated! :)

Beta #1 Also #2 Results.

So on Friday I called my OB/GYN . My beta/quant came back positive&it is 279! They also took another beta Friday to check my levels. I went today to get another beta&was suppose to get an ultrasound but they canceled the ultrasound. Which I should get the results tomorrow or Thursday, hoping tomorrow tho! The nurse called me this morning with my levels they came back in the 1,200s!!! So they more than doubled!!! Which I praise&thank God for!! I have an appt next Thursday on the 14th for another beta&for an ultrasound, but she may wanna do another beta before then. She canceled my ultrasound today so could see the baby next week. Which kinda upsetted me because I was so excited&counting down the days for the ultrasound but it's best I wait because I don't wanna have another ultrasound where we don't see the baby yet&hear the heartbeat! They told me this looks like it will be a normal pregnancy, so please continue to pray for our baby. :) I have such faith in this&in God. I just feel in my gut that the baby will be more that great&in 8ish months (don't know how far along I am yet) I will be giving birth to a beautiful healthy baby!!

Still been having every 1st Trimester symptom, but puking. I haven't started puking tho my morning sickness, nausea, has been so bad. Ryan also has been having morning sickness&extremely tired. My OB/GYN gave me some Finnegan, that I can take 1 every 6 hours, it's helping some but not too much. I'm also working with my doctors to get off my pain meds&anxiety meds. Just been in a lot of pain from the Endometriosis, which she said was normal with woman who have Endo. I've also been feeling that someone is like screatching my stomach out, like taking their hands&screatching it out. I asked her about that today, she said that is normal. Also my uterus has felt as if it's on fire, but she said that is normal with someone who has Endo.

This feels like the best dream I have ever had. It has hit me, yes, but I'm not sure all the way yet. I know once I see the baby&hear the baby's heartbeat that it will seem more real. After almost 5 years of Infertility...this is such a blessing&miracle. My old Infertility Doctor in Colorado said it would take over 200 IUIs to get me pregnant, so this is such a miracle! I'm just so thankful! Not taking any of this for granted. I just wish my Grams&Mother were still with us, so I could share this with them..my Grams was there when I started TTC... I know how happy she would be&same with my Mother. But I know they are watching down on me&here every step of the way, but just not the same as actually being here physically. I don't have any other 'Mother" figures in my life... ahh sorry starting to tear. Gotta stop talking/thinking about that.

Please keep my baby&me in your prayers, I would be so grateful, to anyone who is praying for us! I'll keep ya'll updated!! :) <3